It is 2:53a. I was asleep earlier, but awoke to the sound of my mirror falling off of my closet door. I’d fallen asleep listening to Nancy Leigh Demoss’ broadcast on modesty. It’s a habit of mine to listen to a sermon as I am on my way to sleep. It helps to have that be the last thing I hear before I drift off into dreamworld.
Since I couldn’t sleep, I decided to write down all of the heart rhythms that I have learned in the class I am taking. We are not done, and so far, I have learned how to differentiate between…
normal sinus rhythm
premature atrial contraction (PAC)
premature junctional contraction (PJC)
junctional escape rhythm
accelerated junctional rhythm
1st degree heart block
2nd degree type 1 heart block (wenkebach)
2nd degree type 2 heart block
3rd degree heart block / complete heart block
From day 1 of the class til now, I have been absolutely rocked at the way the human heart works. I had no idea how intricate of an organ it is until now! I remember sitting in class on day 1 shaking my head as my eyes welled up with tears at how the Lord has done His thing in the complex creation of our bodies. And this is just the heart! I can’t imagine what will happen if / when I learn about other systems and organs in the body. I’d probably fall prostrate in worship in the midst of class, lol! It’s been an amazing journey in this class. 2 more weeks, 2 more quizzes, 1 final, and 1 certification exam. I look forward to what will happen. So far, I have made all As by God’s grace. He has totally made my brain work. When people have made comments about me being smart, I have pointed to Him, letting them know that I prayed and asked for the Lord’s help in this course. In doing this, it provided an opportunity to share the Gospel with classmates. He has been good. There are P Waves, PRIs, and QRS complexes floating in my brain on a regular basis. But I enjoy it. It feels like this is part of what I was created to do.
During my brief (I hope it’s brief) period of insomnia tonight, I listened to a sermon by John Loftness from Sovereign Grace’s “Meeting with God” series. The title of it is “How to Profit from Scripture”. In it, John talks about how afflictions will make a theologian out of you by causing you to search God’s Word and cling to it for dear life. As I listened to it, I couldn’t help but think about the physical afflictions I have been dealing with for the past month. Arthritic-like pain in my face and limbs, asthma-like symptoms, acid reflux and heartburn, an upper respiratory infection and bronchitis, taking antibiotics and dealing with the side-effects, insomnia, and more have plagued me a bit. I have found myself frustrated more than a few times as I have prayed and pleaded with God to heal me, but wake up in the same condition on the next day. But I can say this – I have been more diligent in my prayer life and in reading His Word. I have learned to wake up truly grateful that I made it through the night. When the pain has abated, I have learned to thank Him. I am learning to cling to and trust in His Word and in His promises. I am learning to trust Him more. I have enjoyed quiet times where I have just sat and smiled and thought about the Lord. I have grown more in awe of His creation. I have grown more honest with Him about how I feel. I have started journaling DAILY. This is a discipline I have struggled to maintain for YEARS, yet now, not only am I doing it daily, writing page upon page upon page, but I look forward to it. I keep my journal beside my pillow along with my Bible so that getting into it is not far from me when I awake. And when I think back on past prayers, even in this pain and affliction, He is answering prayers. When I prayed things like “Lord help me to be more diligent in studying Your Word” and “Lord, make me a woman of prayer”, I assumed that the Lord would cultivate this as I went on about my normal everyday life, but in this, His provision and work have been sweet. A few weeks ago, as I cried about things to my dear, sweet friend Jenny, she mentioned then that these afflictions were possibly an answer to prayer. Thought that is surely not something you wish to think, I am becoming more and more in agreement with my sweet sister.
And on the flipside – The ailments have caused some changes in my external life. I’ve become a better steward of my health. My eating habits have changed drastically. I have cut out fast food, fried food, carbonated drinks, high fructose corn syrup, and many other things. My diet consists of a lot of grains, produce, and water. I eat spinach and mushrooms almost on a daily basis, and I enjoy it. I have discovered cheese that is non-dairy (or I guess I should say ‘cheese’? lol). I have discovered delicious, yummy ice cream made from hempmilk. I am discovering the versatility of God’s creation outside of animals and animal by-products. My diet has pretty much become vegan with the exception of honey here and there. And you know what? I am okay with it. Though I do long for the day when I can enjoy a good sushi roll, I am enjoying the vastness of God’s creation when it comes to food. And in this, I praise Him. I am also learning to appreciate God’s grace in a nice, hot bubble bath. Such a simple thing, but so very helpful. He is good.
3:25a now. I need to get some sleep! I have my alarm set to wake me up at 9:30 and have a to-do-list that awaits me. So if the Lord wills and allows, I will have a productive day. This entry won’t be posted until late afternoon as I am taking a break from the internet. Technology has become a snare, and on many days I have become its slave, unable to turn away. But that is another entry for another day! Closing Microsoft Notepad for now, but leaving readers with these God-breathed words from the Apostle Paul:
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 ESV