Today I got the results of all the work my doctor ordered to be done on me Monday. The 3 different things came trickling in. First she called to tell me that my x ray was normal. A couple of hours later, she called me to tell me about my blood test results. Whenever my doctor calls me, she’ll ask, “Can you talk?” which always makes me nervous. She informed me that the bloodwork was okay except for one thing. Now, I’d been praying and talking with the Lord because I KNEW something was wrong, and I’d told Him that no matter what it is, I just want to know so that I could go ahead and take the steps to take care of it. Now that it was actually “D Day”, it was a different story. She told me that one of the things she tested me for came back positive for HLA-B27.
Human leukocyte antigen B27 (HLA-B27) is found in about 5-10% of the U.S. population. Its presence has been associated with several autoimmune disorders. The most common of these disorders is ankylosing spondylitis (AS). Approximately 90% of patients with AS carry HLA-B27. Other autoimmune disorders that have an association with the presence of B-27 are juvenile rheumatoid arthritis (80% of patients) and Reiterâ€™s syndrome (reactive arthritis; 50-80% of patients). HLA-B27 is also present in 50% of patients with inflammatory bowel disease with spondylitis and psoriasis vulgaris with spondylitis.
She also said that she wanted to have me tested for some other things. Well, the bad thing is this. The 28th was my last day of insurance so as of this moment, I am uninsured. I told her that I’d get myself some within a week and call her back to get the names of the doctors.
I cannot say how much I’ve cried today because I am stuck. Something is wrong, yet I don’t know what it is, and I don’t have the means to really go forward. I felt really helpless today. I called one of my brothers and did something I have never done. I started crying on the phone with him. I don’t like crying in front of people, but I couldn’t control it. In all my life, I don’t recall ever crying in front of either of my brothers… Well… I take that back. Anyhow, I know God’s sovereign; I still cried. This didn’t mean that I doubted His sovereignty and His will at all. I just felt helpless because I truly didn’t know what to do. I sent text messages out to friends and posted a bulletin to my friends on MySpace, asking them to pray for me. Well, today, my brother, a friend, and a friend on MySpace have all offered to pay for insurance for me. I’m so grateful for that. Tomorrow, I’m going to call and get the information that I need to go ahead and go forth with the insurance so that I can get the further testing done. On top of my body aches and fatigue due to whatever condition I have, I have an intense cold. I’m coughing and my nose is running, and I feel like I have a fever. Yet with it all, the Lord knows it’s happening and He knew that it would, so in that, I find comfort.
I went to the store tonight to buy myself some Advil PM, Tiger Balm patches, and some chicken noodle soup. I’m ready! LOL. Something for the pain, for the cold, and something to alleviate the pain and help me sleep. Yay! Even now, my leg hurts and I hate standing on it or being on it, and it seems to get aggravated when I sit down and get up. I’m thankful that, as far as the leg pain, that it is my left leg and not my right. I can still drive and go places. I am also thankful that it’s just one of my legs and not both.
What have I learned today ? God is sovereign and He knows all. He knew it’d happen before I did and somehow it works out in His plan in the world and for my life. He will also take care of His children. He is still Jehovah Jireh – a provider. And even if He does not choose to heal me of this, IT’S OKAY. It’s a part of His plan somehow. I have also learned that I do not have time to mope around about something I can’t control because a sis has things to do.
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:28 ESV
I also talked to a brother in Christ tonight who said some really encouraging things although I am sure he had no idea. I’m most definitely thankful for that conversation. If the Lord wills that I see tomorrow, I pray that I’m rejuvenated spiritually and physically and ready to go on in spite of my physical ailments and circumstances.
Grace and Peace.